Mumbai: The City That Never Sleeps

Mumbai has always boasted that it is the City That Never Sleeps. The city has been a witness of torrential rains, terrorist attacks, bomb-blasts etc. and none of these have succeeded in deterring the brave spirits of the Mumbaikars and their never-say-die attitude.

Having lived in Kolkata and Bangalore for seventeen years and three years respectively, where everything shuts before 1:00 a.m. and the roads are absolutely desolated with no one in sight, Mumbai was a welcome change as being a city buzzing with activity even late at night past 2:30 a.m. I think I am one of the fortunate ones who has never been chased by the police for being present at Marine Drive in the dark hours of the night.

Every time I am out at night, the ink-coloured skies of the city seem to be sparkling with the painted dreams of the people it inhabits. No matter how late it is, I have never found myself alone in the city - people are always present, be it taxi-drivers, food-vendors or people, like me, just strolling around.

Saturday was the first time I experienced the city shutting down owing to the death of Shiv Sena visionary, Bal Thackeray. It took my friend, Sanika, and I almost 2 hours to reach home. We had to resort to walking on foot since taxis and autos refused passengers. One auto-wala who did agree to drop us to the nearest station gave up half-way when other auto-drivers coming from the opposite direction approached us with their shattered windows and warned us that autos carrying passengers were being pelted with stones and the drivers were being charged with sticks. Trains were relatively empty, mainly because people had no means of reaching the station. While the passing away of a great political leader is indeed a tragic loss for many, it is not right, in my opinion, to force people to mourn his death by bringing the entire city to a stand-still. The city witnessed an eerie silence on the day of his funeral with thousands of his followers gathered at Shivaji Park while the rest of the Mumbaikars were stuck indoors on a weekend. Shops were closed. Restaurants were shut. Even chemists were not open. I was one of the more unfortunate ones: having just returned from Kolkata, my house was not stocked with any groceries and to make matters worse, my building ran out of water supply on Sunday. So, I was subjected to be under house-arrest with no food and no water just because the person who people claim had made Mumbai safe for women and everyone else was gone; and therefore it was not safe to venture out of the house for anyone! Am I the only one who sees the irony of this? In spite of all this, one cannot say that the city was entirely shut with trains still functioning normally.

Although it is the 'City That Never Sleeps', according to me, Mumbaikars are always in a state of perpetual slumber. Have you ever gone even one night without sleep? If yes, you will agree with me when I say that whenever you are sleep-deprived, you tend to be very indifferent the next day. You feel cranky. You do not wish to really talk to anyone. You just want to get done with your work and you want people to leave you alone. If someone is talking to you about their woes, you do not desire to listen to them; you keep wishing that they go away. This is how I normally act when I have not had my beauty sleep and I like to believe that everyone behaves the same way...It is because of this I say that while Mumbai is full of people who never sleep, it hardly has people who are wide awake...People in Mumbai are always on the move, desperate to reach their destination without caring much about fellow-travellers. I have a friend who always claims that in Mumbai you can do anything you like, wear whatever you want - people, here, will not stare at you! There are times when I find myself wondering if that is really a good thing...People in Mumbai do not have time for even giving another person a second glance - they are too self-absorbed and caught up in their own lives...The people, here, are just disconnected from one another and from the other person's reality. They are just interested in ensuring that their life moves forward...My friends often accuse me of being rather sensitive and advice me to be wary of strangers but unfortunately (or fortunately), I just cannot become a Mumbaikar in that aspect despite my love for the city.

People from Kolkata may be termed as 'nosy' or 'interfering' if you wish to see them through those eyes but by their very nature, people in Kolkata are helpful. Several cars sped past us on the Saturday we were stranded on the roads...If it was Kolkata, many cars (I am not saying all of them) would have stopped and offered a lift to some of the people on the roads. When I suggested that we ask someone for a lift, my friend found even that suggestion preposterous!

Death is a natural event. What surprised me is that the natural death of an important figure brought the city to a complete halt when the untimely deaths of several commoners could do nothing to stop the city from bustling with activity! The city of Mumbai finally fell asleep this weekend; unfortunately, the amount of sleep it needs to compensate for being up since several decades was, most probably, not enough.

On Monday, everything seemed to be going back to normal. Even Dadar, the hot-spot of the Shiv Sainiks, returned to its state of regular functioning. This is Mumbai. This is the City of Dreams. There are times when people may occasionally doze away but Mumbaikars will only rest when they sleep in eternal peace. After all, they are living in the City That Never Sleeps...

Home

It's 9:15 p.m. when my flight finally lands in Kolkata. As I am getting off the plane, I find myself heaving a sigh of relief as I breathe in the cool, pleasant air that is all around me - it feels such a welcome change not just from the claustrophobic air-conditioned space of the airplane but also from the humid breeze usually that greets me when I get off the plane at Kolkata. "The air-hostess was right when she announced it was just 23 degrees Celsius," I think in my head.

As I collect my luggage from the conveyor belt, I find my mother waiting for me at the gate. I can't help but smile...
It's been more than 5 years since I left Kolkata but in all these years, there hasn't been even one time when my mother has not come to the airport to pick me. While there are times when I would prefer a quiet drive home to her non-stop chatter, this was a time when I actually experienced a feeling of happiness as I sat with her in the car, listening to random updates about things, people, and life, in general.

"Home is where the heart is."

This quote has never made sense to me! I feel my heart is always in a million places - I feel I give a piece of my heart to any person I become close to or any place that I start to like...I definitely do not feel at home in all these places with all these people...Feeling at ease, feeling good, feeling comfortable - all this is not really the same as 'feeling at home' somewhere, don't you think?

I am very happy living in Bombay. I like the fast-paced nature of the city...I like the way the city just lets you be...It is the place where I get to deal with things my way! I am not dependent on anyone to get things done...It is the city where I am responsible for my own self. The past few weeks, however, have not been easy. My life is in a constant flux of changes and while almost all of them have been for the good, there are times when I feel myself grappling for some moments of peace. Even my mind is getting attuned to the fast-paced life of the 'City of Dreams' and seems to be working over-time without resting for even a moment...There are times I have found myself commanding my mind to just stop functioning and let me rest but it seems to be turning a deaf ear to all my pleas!

The funny part is that from the moment I have landed in Kolkata, I feel that my entire baggage of worries have been dumped behind in Mumbai itself. Here, there is nothing going on in my mind. I can sleep as long as I want to without worrying about any chores. I do not need to worry about the clothes that need to get washed or the food that needs to be ordered or cooked - here, all these errands get taken care of. In Kolkata, I can just laze around, watching my favourite television shows or movies, catching up with friends, and while I enjoy working, sometimes it feels good to just be totally free with nothing to do! Kolkata is the place where I experience 'joy' in each and every moment...

Today, I think I know what 'family' and 'home' mean to me...Family accepts you for what you are and loves you, with no strings attached. While there may be occasional complaints that you do not spend enough time with them or that you do not share much about your life the way you used to, the family does come around in the end and continues to keep hoping for what is best for you...My family has never given up on me even when there have been times that I have felt that there is nothing in life for me to look forward to! Home, according to me, is the place where you are allowed to act the way you want to act - it's ok if I am 23 years old but still want to feel like a baby, snuggling up to my mother; I am allowed to do that at home! While I may not be a 'Bengali' in the true sense of the term, I feel I can identify more with the culture of Kolkata than that of my roots of origin in Bihar...Kolkata is my home because it is the place where my family resides...Each and every time I feel lost, I feel that I discover myself in the 'City of Joy'. My family and my home are my stability-zones in life - while life can keep hurtling me with several changes, these are the few things that are going to remain the same, no matter what...

Your Turn Now!

I am a person who, forever, wears a smile on her face. I smile at people I know. I smile at strangers. I smile at, practically, everyone. A few of my friends find this rather odd but based on my personal experience, I have seen that every time I have smiled at anybody on the street, the smile has always been returned - it does not matter if the person was someone known to me or a stranger. The moment a person starts to smile, his or her mood automatically becomes happy. Even when I have been down in the dumps - and believe me - there have been many such times - I have experienced instant moments of happiness each and every time someone succeeded in causing my face to break into a smile.

A couple of months ago, I had heard about the Your Turn Now! initiative from a colleague of mine. I was told that in this initiative, people are issued 'Your Turn Now!' cards.  Whenever this card-holder does a deed of kindness, he or she passes on the card to the person who is grateful of the kindness so that the person can remember that he or she must do a good deed ahead, and the chain continues with the card getting passed on from one kind act to the next. I found this concept to be rather fascinating. If people actually become a part of this chain, there will be kindness, joy, and contentment everywhere because the entire city will be bustling with people who are on the look-out of doing good deeds for someone.

A week ago, my colleague and I received our stack of cards. I got a chance to pass on my card to someone the very next day! I was returning home from class, travelling in an unpleasantly crowded local train. A superfluity of nuns were also on the train. Most of them seemed middle-aged though a few of them looked quite old. They were all carrying heavy bags. As the destination neared, there was an entire swarm of women waiting to get inside so much so that it was difficult for the people to even get down. One of the nuns was just stuck and she looked petrified! I had got off the train safely and her reaction did not surprise me - the Mumbai locals can daunt the strongest of spirits if they are not used to travel and she appeared to be a hapless, old woman. I was reminded of my initial days of travelling and how uncomfortable it used to be on days when there were huge crowds...I somehow managed to break through the crowd and help the woman get down with her bags. As soon as she got down, she was surrounded by the other nuns who were comforting her. They all thanked me for helping her get down. Usually I would have shrugged it off and merely dismissed it as being a very small thing but I was, suddenly, reminded of the card in my wallet. I just handed 1 card to the nun saying, "Don't thank me. Just keep this card until you have done a good deed and then pass it on." The nun merely smiled. She thanked me again and blessed me.

As I walked back home from the station, I couldn't help smiling. Although I had helped someone else, I was the one who was feeling high on life! It is indeed true when people say that if you want your day to be bright, just go ahead and try to brighten up somebody else's! We all are extremely busy in our daily lives but all it takes is one moment to make a positive difference in somebody else's universe.

If you feel that this post has brought a smile on your face or inspired you in any way to pitch in for a good cause, do become a part of the Your Turn Now! movement and spread smiles everywhere! These cards are free of cost and can be ordered on their website: http://yourturnnow.in. You can also text your postal address at +919029602897 or email rushabh@yourturnnow.in to get your cards. 

Choices

“Alice came to a fork in the road. 'Which road do I take?' she asked.
'Where do you want to go?' responded the Cheshire Cat.
'I don't know,' Alice answered.
'Then,' said the Cat, 'it doesn't matter.” 
- Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland

The month of October has been a month of revelations for me in a lot of ways. I recently pursued a course on Integrated Spiritual Hypnosis. Despite not believing in the concept of past lives or abstract concepts such as foreign energies and auras, the course opened doors to some realities to which I had probably developed some sort of a blind-spot. 

I have always lived under the illusion that my life is perfect. It's not that I am not aware of my shortcomings or the things in life that I don't have, I just have a tendency to focus on the good side of everything because that is something that sprinkles my life with happiness. While doing this course, it dawned on me that perhaps my positive attitude does have its demerits - I tend to trust people easily and even when they disappoint, I choose to overlook that flawed part of them. I also discovered the way I always end up playing the part of a 'Rescuer', going out of the way to help someone in need. In reality, instead of accepting the fact that there are times when I have felt victimized and violated, I project the part of the 'victim' on the other person and try emerging as the Saviour. 

Today, people describe me as a person who is bold, straightforward and someone who never hesitates to speak her mind. I got a glimpse of two past lives during the process of past life regression therapy. While people from different belief-systems can argue over whether we have just one life or many lives, I am choosing to step aside from that debate and just talk about what I "saw" or "imagined" in that hypnotic trance. In both the lives, I saw myself as a helpless, young woman who was vulnerable, failing miserably to take charge of her life. Ultimately, that led to my downfall or doom. When I was discussing this with my friends, most of them were astounded at what I was like in the past and relieved that I am no more that person today. However, I still found myself having a lot of questions and at the moment, I have come to the realization that, perhaps, I am not that different in this life as well. I can put up a bold face in front of the whole, wide world but I know the dark shadows that haunt me when I am all alone, all by myself. 

If I were to draw parallels from my past lives to the present one, there are some strikingly painful similarities as if the stage and the actors are all set, once more, to play the parts they have already rehearsed for in the previous lives...When this realization hit, I found myself very disturbed and wondered what was the point of going on with life if I have no control over what is going to come my way. However, this morning, my friend, Mohini, was kind enough to share some write-ups with me, which reminded me that life is actually all about the choices we make. It does not matter if life is teaching me an incomplete lesson from a previous life-time or is bestowing a fresh lesson my way, what matters is the wisdom to understand the patterned regularities of one's behaviour and to break these patterns, if necessary. 

Letting go isn't something that has ever been easy for me...While there are people and things I have been able to discard from my life in the wink of an eye, when I look back, I realize that they didn't mean anything to me. People in life who I deeply care about are people I can never give up on - no matter how many times they disappoint or hurt me. I am always scared of letting go because I fear the emptiness that will be left in my heart if I truly let go of that emotion or that person. Mohini, once again, reminded me that Nature abhors vacuum and something will certainly come and occupy that empty space. With this powerful thought embedded deep in my mind, today, I have started walking on the path of letting go of my fears and inhibitions and simply walking the road of life with my head held high. I do not know where my destination lies but I am determined to enjoy the entire journey. I am hoping that this choice that I have made is a healthy one...

The Jigsaw Puzzle

As a child, I always enjoyed solving jigsaw puzzles. The entire process of attempting to arrange the separate pieces of a puzzle in the correct manner to ensure that they form one complete picture was an amazing journey! Even at the age of 23 years, jigsaw puzzles continue to fascinate me - of course, instead of solving a picture made up of 200 pieces, today, I try solving a puzzle of 5000 pieces.

I feel that my world is nothing but a jigsaw puzzle. Each piece of me is what helps in the creation of the picture of my world. There are some pieces which show my likes. Similarly there are pieces that show all the things I do not like. There are some pieces I proudly showcase before the world and there are those pieces which I always try hiding in a corner. Some pieces are easy to join and they just seem to fall into place correctly. In the same manner, there are some things in life that come to us very easily.

There are some pieces which we feel belong to one particular area and actually we may end up fixing them in the wrong place. This happens to us at so many junctures of life. We keep fixating on a particular desire and we keep getting restless if it remains unfulfilled. At this point, we feel stuck because we are not able to progress towards the completion of the picture. Our life comes to a stand-still and we start operating from a tunnel-vision where all that matters is fulfillment of that desire. In the process, we start moving away from the process of actually living our life. We stop the process of completing the picture because we are just not able to remove the piece from that area.

It is important, at this juncture, to note that the piece by itself is not wrong. It is alright to have wishes and desires. The trick is to balance our attention in such a manner that we are able to focus on other things in life as well instead of just getting fixated at that spot. With time, as we keep fitting various pieces together, the number of missing pieces will automatically lessen.

Completing a jigsaw puzzle with 1000 pieces itself takes me more than 3 days. The puzzle of life has millions of such pieces - many of the pieces still waiting to be discovered. We do not know each and every aspect of our personality. If we knew all the secrets, all of us would be enlightened souls! Not all of us have a complete picture of life - to have the complete picture could take us several lives. Therefore, the true joy does not always lie in completing the picture - sometimes one can experience joy by simply being at peace with the missing pieces.

The Street Food Of Mumbai

It is only when one visits Mumbai does one truly understand why it is referred to as 'The City That Never Sleeps'. No matter what happens, nothing ever stops. The fast-paced life of the 'City of Dreams' is something that strikes you from the very moment you set foot inside Mumbai. This aspect of the culture of Mumbai can very obviously be seen depicted in terms of its food as well.

People in Mumbai are always on the go and eating out on the street is a daily ritual for many of them. No points for guessing, therefore, that among a lot of other things, Mumbai is also famous for its street-food.

In the wee hours of morning itself, whether you are at a station or passing by-lanes, you will see hawkers selling cutting chai and omelettes or egg bhurji with hot buns or paos. The cutting chai is usually sugary sweet unless you are fortunate enough to get a chaiwallah who makes it slightly 'kadak' or 'strong'. You may also come across variations being sold in the form of 'elaichi wali chai' or 'adrak wali chai'.

As far as Mumbai is concerned, ‘pao’ is like the undisputed ruler in street food. It would be safe to say that vada pao is the face of Mumbai street-food. For many people, that piece of vada squashed inside a pao is an actual meal and not just a tidbit you grab on the way. There are several other versions of pao - you have Bhajia Pao which is a pao stuffed inside with oily onion rings; Anda Pao which is a half-sliced boiled egg enclosed inside the pao; and Samosa Pao in which you have an entire samosa stuffed inside that one piece of pao! There are also Usal Pao, Misal Pao, Kheema Pao and paos of numerous other varieties. Pao bhaji is another item that is very popular in Mumbai.

Visit any beach in Mumbai - Juhu or Chowpatty - and you will come across several hawkers selling ice-golas, kulfi and a wide range of 'chaats'. If you are from Kolkata, you may find Bhelpuri to be similar to the 'jhaal muri' that is abundantly sold on the streets of the City of Joy, and you may also feel that pani puri is no match to the 'puchkas' that you get; but you can still try out other 'chaat' items such as Dahi Puri, Sev Puri and Ragda Pattice.

Walking down the sandy beaches licking an ice-gola made of one or more flavours of your choice (mango, orange, kala khatta, rose, khus, etc.) or savouring a mixed plate of malai, kesar pista, chickoo, mango or strawberry kulfi is one of the many joyous moments you can experience out of being in a city located so close to the sea. Even if you are someone who loves cleanliness and the dirty beaches strike a chord of disharmony in you, do not give this experience a miss.

Mumbai is also famous for its 'frankie' which is nothing but a roti wrap that comes with a wide range of stuffings from paneer to chicken to vegetables to eggs.

Since Mumbai is close to the states of Karnataka and Andhra Pradesh, it comes as no surprise that the city has a wide chain of South Indian stalls, restaurants and lunch-homes serving different kinds of dosas, idlis and vadas. In many places, you may find the sambhar to taste a tad bit too sweet but you won't usually have any complaints about the chutneys that are served as accompaniments.

It is not an uncommon sight to find hawkers selling fruit-plates on the streets of Mumbai. While you can always question the freshness of these fruits, do not hesitate to try fresh fruit juices, milkshakes and sandwiches from any of the stalls in Mumbai. These items from the roadside kiosks usually taste good.

As the sun sets and the evening arrives, you will find stalls beginning to grill skewers of various meat kababs. The kababs that you get from these small roadside joints are almost always finger-licking good - if you are adventurous, you could try items like bheja fry; or you could just stick to the safe side and enjoy seekh kabas and chicken tikka kababs amongst several others. 

Mumbai is a tourist hub and it has many sights and sounds to explore. However, taking time out and feasting on the various delicacies that the streets of Mumbai offer is an opportunity that every person who comes to this city should experience at least once.

Happy Teachers' Day!

I know that I have been away from the blogging circuit for quite some time now...I have been up to a lot of things and at present, I am spending some time with my family in my home-town, Kolkata.

Today is September 5th - all over India, this day is widely celebrated as Teachers' Day.

I am not very comfortable with the concept of assigning a particular day of the year to the celebration of a particular relationship. For instance, I find it really awkward when friends wish me 'A Very Happy Friendship Day' on the first Sunday of every August. I like being with friends and spending time with them but I do not feel it is necessary to celebrate that beautiful relationship on that one particular day. The creation of a day poses other problems before me - for example, there is a limit to the number of people that I can meet in a day; it is not possible for me to meet my entire bunch of friends on one Sunday just because it happens to be 'Friendship Day'. I also do not like being subjected to emotional blackmail by the use of sentences like, "You met her on Friendship Day but you could not find even half an hour to meet me!"

Teachers' Day, on the other hand, is a fairly simpler day. I just wish some teachers and thank them for all the things that I have learnt from them. This was the first time I got messages from my students and I was quite overwhelmed after reading some of the messages. It always feels good to know that you have made a difference in someone else's life in a positive manner. However, I realized one thing: while my students have learnt a lot of things from me, there are things that they have managed to teach me as well!

I feel I have learnt something from every person that I have met in life. Each interaction with a person has always taught me something new. I have learnt from the accolades of praise that I have got but I have also learnt from criticisms. I have learnt something from every emotional outburst and I have also learnt from something as simple as a personal opinion, which may have been very different from my own perspective of looking at the same thing. We are always in the process of learning things - we just do not realize it, and even if we do, we only tend to acknowledge the formal institutions of education. Learning is an ongoing lifelong process and on this day, I would like to raise a toast to cheer the teaching spirit that is present in each one of us.

To all the people whose blogs I read and to all the people who are reading this, I wish all of you A Happy Teachers' Day and I thank you profusely for all the knowledge you have consciously or unconsciously bestowed upon me.